Soul contracts, Covid trauma and other tales
Explore 4 potent topics to deepen your connection to yourself and to life
Don’t know about you, but last week was quite rough for me personally, and also deeply healing.
Today I’ll be writing to you in a different way than I normally do. Instead of a one-themed piece, I’ll share about multiple topics that have been coming up for me.
Ready? Take my hand and let’s jump in!
Covid trauma - It’s real!
With spring arriving, and some restrictions easing up, I can feel that, while I don’t think the pandemic is over (far from it), the trauma of the experience is not as acute and I’m finding myself in the place where I can start digesting some of what we went through.
My kids were home on spring break last week and for five days I was juggling work and being home with them. This dance, like for so many, has been a common experience over the past two years and I’ve gotten quite good at it. The constant pivoting, shuffling, surrendering, readjusting, changing – for myself and my children – has been a big part of our daily life.
Last Friday I had a friend lined up to help with the kids and two playdates in the making when I got a call that the kids might have been exposed to Covid and there was a possibility that I had to cancel everything *yet again*.
The combination of 1. the feeling that the pandemic was easing up and 2. letting my guard down 3. coupled with this news and knowing that two highly anticipated events we had scheduled might have to be canceled put me in touch with a part of myself that’s been working so GD hard for the past years, and she was really tired.
I acknowledged to myself how painful it had been to move across the country and leave my beloved community behind in the midst of this massively difficult time for all of us. I cried from deep inside that part. Tears of despair, anger, sadness, powerlessness, and once again, surrender.
I asked what that part needed and the message was clear: She needs to be heard, validated, and not made to hurry up and get over it.
Do you have a part that’s hurting from what you’ve had to go through in the past two years? If so, what does that part need from you right now?
Soul contracts
The morning that all of this went down, my friend Katrina sent me this video. It’s about “Soul contracts”. It’s funny because Katrina is a follower of Jesus (Yeshua) and the Bible and this video has a distinct New Age flavor, but nonetheless, she felt it had captured an aspect of human relationships that she felt was important to acknowledge. I agree.
When I look back at my life it’s clear that there are three types of relationships that I’ve engaged in. Let’s call them: Soulmates, Karmic and Neutral.
How I identify them:
Soulmate relationships: Anyone who feels distinctly familiar, like I’ve known them forever even when we just met, who makes my life on earth easier, bearable, and feel like home.
Karmic relationships: Can feel incredibly euphoric and attractive at first but has taught me maaaajor life lessons.
Neutral relationships: These are the relationships that are the equivalent of extras on a movie set. I interact with them but there’s no charge either way.
(If you’re not into New Age language you could call them: Enhancers, Teachers, and Neutral. The titles are irrelevant, the experience is universally human.)
In my life, I’ve had a heck of a time dealing with my relationships and how to make sense of them and this framework helps me manage my internal experience of life a bit better.
Here’s how:
One of my Achilles heels is that I can easily fall into “good or bad” or “right or wrong” thinking. (How utterly human of me!) This type of thinking reared its head again last week and I realized I have more healing to do on this front.
I don’t want to participate in this type of thinking because I know from experience it keeps me and everyone else stuck. As soon as I make another person wrong, I am in direct opposition to life’s ultimate truth, that we all are equally loved by our creator. And when I go all *judge mode*, I only trap myself. (I’ll have to write more about this later since it’s a big topic).
Here’s the thing that I’m learning that makes all the difference in how I deal with the Karmicly flavored relationships: It IS possible to hold someone accountable without making them “the bad guy”. It’s not easy, but it’s possible.
That’s where this framework comes in handy. When I surrender to the curriculum of life (more about this below) and the human experience and the fact that I need all three types of relationships to grow in my capacity to love - I feel FREE.
Do you get caught up in black/white thinking too? When does it show up for you?
The power of straightforward communication
Money. What an amazing teacher! Last week I had a lot of money stuff come up for healing. I’ve had a situation with a client recently where we found ourselves in a time where several big projects needed to be completed at once and the budget I had set for the month didn’t work and had to be raised.
In the past four years where I’ve had various types of marketing and business coaching clients and payment retainers, I’ve had to grow in my capacity to communicate around money. At first, I really sucked at it. Anything to do with money felt absolutely terrifying. But I knew healing my money stuff held a big part of my freedom and that’s why I’ve been so committed to healing my money wound.
In a conversation with my client, I realized just how far I had come in my relationship with money and myself. Earlier in the week, I had sat with myself and truly looked at all the dimensions of why I had made some financial decisions and as we discussed what had happened I simply told her the whole truth and communicated directly around this loaded topic.
The conversation was magical, powerful, and healing and we ended up with a newfound understanding together.
This interaction showed me what’s possible when we:
Own our shit
Do our own work to truly understand ourselves and love the hurting parts (it takes time!)
Are able to communicate straight and truthfully from the heart
(I admit it. There were many times when I could not do this and I hurt people. And I feel compassion for myself now and for the people I hurt. I’m still sad that had to happen for me to grow.)
It also showed me: I now have the receipt that the work I’ve done in my life was worth it! My interactions and relationships now are proof that my painstakingly hard work on my own healing process is making a safer experience for me and everyone around me.
Is there a situation in your life that could benefit from more heartfelt, straightforward communication? What small steps can you take toward that?
Being miracle prone
On Saturday afternoon I hopped in my car and drove down to Boston for a live book event.
How I ended up there was a series of serendipitous moments so I felt very guided in *the unfolding* of my life, which is a feeling I adore. That “right place at the right time - wonderful things are afoot” kind of feeling. This incidentally is one of the signature vibes I work on cultivating in my life as much as I can! Yum!
I was going to see three authors speak about their books. I only knew one of them from before. Her name is Lissa Rankin (MD) and she’s been a source of sanity in the New Age world’s development during covid. She’s a rare both/and kind of healing industry leader who can advocate for miracles and vaccinations in the same breath. She’s been very vocal in her beliefs on Facebook and she’s shared resources from experts and scientists on the front lines.
Her new book “Sacred Medicine - A Doctor’s Quest to Unravel the Mysteries of Healing” just came out and she was at this event to speak about it.
When I walked up to the event venue and saw Lissa standing there I started crying with joy! (She was kind enough to let me take this photo.)
As I walked into the venue I was warmly greeted by two women. They let me know that we’d be receiving free copies of two of the books and showed me into the beautiful gallery space where the event was held.
Next followed two hours of powerful shares from the three authors and at the end; a guided exercise, group singing, and dancing!
I can’t even write about it without tearing up, the feeling of singing and dancing with other people was deeply nourishing and so FUN! Finally!
Here are some of my key takeaways:
From Nancy Slonim Aronie:
Accept the curriculum: When you accept that you’re in the University of Life and what’s happening is your curriculum, you are free.
Approach difficult experiences with a clean slate and curiosity and you will get a new outcome.
Writing your truth is medicine.
Give praise for creative expression, not criticism.
“I don’t think anyone can really teach writing. What I know I can do is create a safe place for writers to write.”
— Nancy Slonim Aronie
From Jeffery Reidiger MD:
The four pillars of health: healing your immune system, healing your nutrition, healing your stress response, and healing your identity.
The goal is not necessarily to arrive at an absolute answer. The goal is to improve the quality of your questions. The quality of your question determines the quality of your answer. The questions we ask are the guiding light that moves us forward.
Jeffery’s modeling of a humble leader who can speak from the heart and lift up women around him.
“Illness begins in the soul, and when a healing occurs there, the physical body then “catches up” to this new reality.”
— Jeffery Reidiger MD
From Lissa Rankin MD:
The healing journey is complex and individual and we can’t know what’s possible for us until we try.
Constantly showing up with curiosity and humility creates healing.
There’s an immense amount of people who are trying to capitalize on the suffering of others. Be discerning in who you go to for healing.
Dancing and singing together is the most potent medicine we have.
“...any healing tools and practices that heal the traumas that cloak the spark of divinity that lives inside each of us. Sacred medicines fuel and strengthen that spark and can make some people miracle prone.”
“…the ones who long to live in alignment with their own Inner Pilot Lights start flocking to you. Your changing vibration attracts your true soul community to you. And as a sort of thank-you for aligning with your true self, the Universe often draws into your life more and more true joy, unconditional love, professional vitality, physical health, and a sense of connection with the Divine. You may lose some, or much, of what makes up your comfort zone. But what you’ll gain when you commit to this journey is priceless. The prize for your commitment is FREEDOM.”
— Lissa Rankin MD
How far I’ve come - closing words…
Omg, you gorgeous person reading this. I can’t imagine how many typos and grammatical errors you’ve spotted in this article 😂. It’s just how it is today since last week was a sort of magical shitshow. I am here with you modeling sticking with something (in my case, writing this post), over being perfect and I feel pretty dang good about it.
As I look back at all the healing and upleveling I’ve experienced in the past year I truly see it’s all because of my commitment to my own healing process on my own terms. I believed in myself and what I needed. I showed up in the arena and God/Love met me there. It’s taken me almost two decades of work to experience moments of true peace. I can say without a shadow of a doubt, that it was worth it. Holy Communion with the Divine As Self was worth it.
I love hearing from you! Come chat with me in the comments. 👋
Much love,
Karna 💜
Soul contracts, Covid trauma and other tales
Ahhh those karmic relationships. What zingers they can be. Love this too: "That “right place at the right time - wonderful things are afoot” kind of feeling. This incidentally is one of the signature vibes I work on cultivating in my life as much as I can! Yum!"
Thanks Karna for sharing a lot of food for thought.I experience a lot of "black and white thinking" especially at work.Many times i am quick to label some work colleagues as unhelpful or rigid .It is only afterwards when I delve deep I realise his/her constraints and the reason behind the cold behaviour.
That is why I make a conscious effort nowadays to defer my judgement till I get the real reasons.
Again thanks for reminding me again